God's Desires That Led Me To My Spouse

Hi Singles! I am extremely... excited to publish this blog from my very first blog contributor, Mrs. Brandy Burton! I won't give it all away, but you are about to read a very... inspiring, encouraging and lovely story. Enjoy!

My story is somewhat interesting. Growing up in a broken family, seeing divorce after divorce, I made a decision to never marry. I’d honestly established the “I Don’t Need A Man” attitude and lived most of my life void of real, lasting relationships. I had probably made all of these decisions by the time I was 15. It’s amazing how the little one’s perception of life can shape their entire life’s values. I buried very deeply the unspoken core belief that marriage just wasn’t for me. However, I always wanted to be a mother. And as a Christian, that posed as a conflict for me. So I decided to open my heart to God and allow Him to reshape my perception of marriage. That began my process of surrendering my heart and fears to God’s way. As I began to do that, I asked for wisdom liberally, and God even filled my heart with his desires. I know that because some of the ideas were honestly too mature for me, and I did not even understand why I desired such things. But here are a few of the things that I desired, and the results of God answering my prayers:

1. I vowed to God that I wouldn’t give another man any of my time until I knew that he was God’s man for me. 

I didn’t have ANYMORE time for wasted relationships. I already felt that I didn’t need a man, so I had a very low tolerance for them. By this point, I’d had 2 short lived relationships and 2 heartbreaks too many, and just didn’t want that pain anymore. My heart was just too precious to continue to be trampled upon by people who were never meant for me. I thought that there had to be a better way. And there was!! But it required me to trust God and walk in faith instead of fear. Of course, many guys popped up in that time, but I honored my vow to God and did not get distracted.

2. I needed God to present NEON SIGNS when my husband came! I just HAD TO KNOW FOR SURE!! 

I didn’t trust myself AT ALL to make a decision so big with the 75%+ divorce rate in my family. So, I had to know that he was God’s choice for me, especially because if I knew that before going in, then I knew that he’d be worth fighting for in the darkest of seasons. And when my husband came, God couldn’t have been more clear to me on His choice for me!! And when dark seasons came in our marriage, I couldn’t waver in what I knew that God had shown me.

3. I prayed to God for a man who was whole.

Wholeness ensures clarity in communication between God and Man. It’s kind of like back in Eden when God walked and talked with Adam. That’s the kind of communication that I wanted him to have with God because at that time, that’s the communication that I’d had with God, and I wanted a spiritual leader in my husband, so I wanted a man more mature in His Walk with God that mine. I knew that if I was going to be secure in trusting him to spiritually lead our home, that I would need someone who I knew could hear the voice of God. My husband was that man when we met, as was I, so it was a perfect match ❤️ When we talked, our conversations were anointed. We sat at pianos on many occasions and worshipped God together. He even led me to more spiritual breakthroughs that I could not achieve alone. It was a God-ordained union!! 

4. I wanted a man who loved God more than he loved me.

This may sound crazy, but this is literally God’s design for all of His children. The first and greatest command is that we love God with all of our being. The second greatest command is to love others. I wanted a man who lived by God’s order. I knew that if he was properly aligned, that he would obey God in spite of me. This also meant to me that even if I wasn’t doing, speaking or thinking properly, because of his relationship with God, that he would be able to extend grace to me until I got right. This also meant that I would be able to trust his leadership and respect him as I should. When I met my husband, he definitely lived up to these things.

5. I wanted a man who was healthy and physically fit (preferably with a basketball player’s build - I just LOVED their physique).

This was actually important to me. I was a runner at the time and I really wanted a spouse that would prioritize health just as much as I did, from working out to meals eaten at home. God saw fit to honor this request ❤️

6. I wanted a man of strong Faith!

For a prone-to-fear individual like me, I knew that someone in the marriage would have to truly trust God. What better person than the Head of the Household!? If both of us were fearful and lacking in faith, I just imagined that we’d have a difficult time really walking in the promises of God. So I desired someone who would balance me out in this area. My husband is definitely that person! He is a risk taker, and fearless in so many ways!

I hope that by reading this article today that you have gained some wisdom and insight into what would benefit you in a relationship. You don’t have to desire the same things that I did. But I hope that by reading this you better understand how faithful God is to His children’s needs and desires, that you better understand how much He loves you, and that you begin to hope and believe for His best for you rather than anything you could ever choose for yourself. I also pray that you would be enabled and strengthened in your heart to patiently believe for and wait on His best and never choose to settle! I’m Brandy, I love you, God loves you and I’m signing off 😉

***So, did you enjoy Brandy's story? I got a feeling you did, because I most definitely enjoyed it. I mean... I was blessed, encouraged and inspired! I cried tears of joy, took mental notes, and more. I even read it several times... LOL! Now, I want to give a very special shout out and HUGE THANK YOU to my dear friend and sista, Brandy Burton! You were the answer to my prayers and I appreciate your obedience to God. I am forever grateful to you for contributing and ministering to sooo... many individuals. This is what we as singles need to help us in our seasons of singleness and even those engaged. Please comment below and share with us how this blog helped you. Share this blog with others!

Before I go, just in case you'd like to connect with Brandy and her husband who is also my friend and brotha, Pastor Jonathan Burton, you can locate them via Facebook at Regeneration Church NOLA.***

Much love, peace, & blessings,

Demetria "MeMe" Henry