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Writer's pictureDemetria "MeMe" Henry

Simply Want It All

Updated: Apr 19, 2021



Hi, singles!

I hope that you've had a wonderfully blessed past two weeks since we were last in this space. The topic of this blog was inspired by the song "Simple Things" by singer/songwriter, Musiq Soulchild. If you're not familiar with it, feel free to check out the video following the end of this blog. Although I have gained inspiration from this topic, I do have my take on this. We all know someone or may have been one to enjoy the finer things in life, that is houses, cars, jewelry, worldly possessions, some even crave fortune and fame. I guess you're wondering where I am going with this, well I am thinking about dating and relationships that are solely focused on materialistic things.


There are some relationships where be it male/female or both that are so caught up in material things, spending money on this and that, and never get a chance to experience real true love. Some couples don't even take the time out to know each other because of their lifestyles of buying love and wanting to keep winning the other person over with things seem to be more important and to me, that is just way too much. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not saying that there is anything wrong with wanting nice things and buying nice things for someone you're interested in someone you love and are in a relationship with, after all, love is what love does and that's just one way to express your love and care for your special someone. However, when it's a situation of you being involved who has an expensive lifestyle, always expects expensive gifts, wants to eat at expensive restaurants, has to have the best of clothes, jewelry, etc. it's like you can't please them enough. I could imagine that being overwhelming especially when you're just trying to get to know someone and just want an opportunity to just spend quality time together. Some relationships are built like this where they try to impress others or outshine other couples. I once experienced being given nice and expensive gifts in two of my past relationships. I cherished those gifts because they were bought for me out of genuine love; not to overly impress me, or to buy my love, love was already there. Those were special occasion gifts, just because gifts, and just to say "I love you" gifts. So, I knew the difference. Because I wasn't the type to always have my hand out and wasn't trying to keep up with others, it was nothing for me to be given nice gifts. This is where the balance comes in and we all need balance. It's not always buying or wanting nice gifts but it's being grateful for the finer things when necessary and also enjoying the simple things. It's when you're not over-indulgent in just one area, but when you've grown to appreciate both.

When I think about couples and those who love the lavish lifestyle, I wonder, what if they just learned to experience the simpler things in life, would their perception of things change? I have always been on the simple side of life. I love the more simple things like spending quality time, taking walks in the park, eating at nice but inexpensive restaurants sometimes, after all, food at expensive restaurants aren't always that impressive and don't always please the palate LOL! I love going to the movies, going to concerts, comedy shows, sharing movie nights at home, road trips, traveling, working on projects together, sharing good conversation, and lots of laughter, I mean the list goes on and on but you know where I am going with this, just simply simple. I even consider when someone offers to help me, goes out of their way to help me or to even care about my well-being, that's a plus. A simple phone call, text message just to say "hello I'm thinking of you", "I love you", "what do you need"? "how's your day going"? etc. is where it's at. Just to know that you're being thought of and consistent efforts are being made, taking the more simple route can lead to winning over the heart big time! LOL! See, for me, it's just that simple. Just give me the more simple things in life, and I'm happy with that. It can be a turn-off sometimes though when the other person does way too much. Take time out to learn someone, spend quality time together getting to know one another, and that way you will get to know that person for who they are and as a plus, even learn how to win their heart without all of the extra unnecessary efforts. When someone does too much, I'm thinking "what are you trying to prove here"? Let's just take our time getting to know one another, and just enjoy the moments of this possibly leading us into something beautiful. For some like me, it doesn't take much to please us, because simple goes a long way. You can have all of the gifts and materialistic things you'd ever want and be missing out on experiencing true love because you cherish the tangibles over a love that can be sure to last. Don't miss out on an opportunity of getting to know a good person, experiencing a genuine relationship, and true love because your priorities are in the wrong place. The desire for temporary satisfaction can cause you to miss out the joys of a true and simple dating/relationship experience.

I'll share this story with you. There was this guy that I was introduced to by a family member. We had I known one another for a few months, so we were on the friendship level and potentially dating. This particular guy earned a really good salary. One day, we were sitting in his truck talking and he decided to pull out his check stub to show me. In my mind, I was thinking, "what is he doing"? When he showed me his check stub, I wasn't impressed, at all. Yes, the figures were major, but I just wasn't won over by that, furthermore, I gathered quickly that his intentions in showing me his check stub was to see how I would react and if I'd be easily won over by a dollar. My response was, "well I see why you get paid a really good salary because you work a really dangerous job, and long hours, so by right, you're earning every dollar and cent" then I quickly returned his check stub to him. What I was not going to do was jump up and down or work up excitement over someone else's hard-earned money. It was then when I knew, I had no desire to be with this guy, because he was the type to flash his cash and I was ready to dash, LOL! I knew where he was getting at, I can read between the lines easily. I honestly felt offended at first because I am not the kind of woman to run after a dollar. So, for him to try me in that manner let me know right away (along with some other reasons) that he just wasn't the one for me, after all, I was not his girlfriend nor his wife so his check stub was none of my business whatsoever. So, I'll tell them, you don't have to try and impress me with things, what I am more impressed by are the more simple things and ways of winning my heart, and it's as simple as that.


Ask or challenge yourself to think about whether you are the person who enjoys the higher-end things, simple things, or do you enjoy the balance of both? What have you experienced in your past as it relates to this topic? Did this blog help you in any way?

I'll leave you with this, India Arie sang "Little things, it's the little things and the joy they bring". I especially love this line of the lyrics;

Simple as a phone call

Just to make it known

That you're gonna be a little late

Pure as a kiss on the cheek

And a word that everything will be okay

Call in the morning from my little sister

Singing to me happy birthday

When you quest for fortune and fame

Don't forget about the SIMPLE THINGS

I hope that you've enjoyed this blog. Please like, share, and comment. I'd love to hear from you!

Much love, peace, & blessings,

Demetria


 

Click below to enjoy these songs:





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